Cinq méthodes, un homme utilise pour abuser des sentiments d’une femme, la manipule et finit par lui faire du mal. Donc pour éviter d’être blessée, il faut être bien attentive à ses mots clés pour se protéger du prédateur.
Dans le temps, nos grand-mères répétaient un proverbe que je vais traduire ici littéralement « un conseil contre un dromadaire ».
Alors écoutez bien mes chères dames pour déjouer les manipulateurs.
1- Il promet d’abandonner L’AUTRE (épouse, fiancée, petite amie) pour vous : soyez prudente et septique, cela pourra bien vous flatter mais c’est là que se cache ses mauvaises intentions. Demandez-vous si vraiment il est malheureux dans son couple, il doit mettre fin à sa relation avec L’AUTRE à cause des problèmes qu’il affronte et non pas POUR vous. Lui, il pèse bien l’effet émotionnel de ces fausses promesses et vous tient ainsi captive même s’il ne quittera jamais sa partenaire.
2- Il vous dit « j’ai besoin de votre soutien financier sinon… ». Un manipulateur repère la gentillesse et la bonté d’une femme pour en user, pour tirer d’elle de l’argent ou un quelconque soutien financier en lui faisant croire qu’il passe par une mauvaise situation. Si cet homme persiste a toujours prendre et jamais donner rompez vite avec lui car dans une relation amoureuse saine, les rapports se basent sur un Win to Win deal.
3- Le « je ne suis pas encore prêt à m’engager dans une relation sérieuse et pour la vie » doit signifier pour vous qu’il vous exploite pour ses propres intérêts et qu’il ne s’investira jamais dans une relation amoureuse vraie avec vous. A la rigueur, il peut avoir besoin de votre compagnie et de votre support émotionnel mais là son attitude doit vous faire comprendre que vous êtes de loin meilleure que lui, qu’il est très égoïste et qu’il consommera votre énergie, vos sentiments et surtout votre temps. En abusant de vous à des fins de proximité physique, certains hommes pourraient utiliser l’excuse du « pas prêt à s’engager » pour être physiquement proches sans faire face aux retombées émotionnelles. Il est important de voir quand quelqu’un évite toujours de parler de l’avenir de votre relation ou de votre engagement.
4- Il vous dit que vous êtes de loin meilleure que son ex et qu’il n’a jamais senti ce que vous lui faites sentir : les manipulateurs usent de la flatterie comme moyen pour vous contrôler ; ils vous complimentent à gogo pour vous faire sentir uniques et vous rendent ainsi indépendantes d’eux. Être appréciées est très important dans une relation mais en sauvegardant toujours votre clairvoyante et ne jamais laisser la flatterie vous aveugler. Ce qui compte dans une relation, c’est de ne pas le laisser utiliser vos émotions contre vous ou bien ne pas accorder de l’importance à vos besoins sentimentaux et vos soucis vis-à-vis de la relation.
5- S’il vous demande « j’ai besoin que tu me rendes service … je ne peux pas le faire de moi-même » une simple sollicitation d’aide peut apparemment être bénigne mais pour des manipulateurs cela peut servir de moyen puissant pour manœuvrer leurs conjoints car ils abusent de leur gentillesse et leur générosité. Aidez votre partenaire, peut approfondir les liens de votre relation mais cela ne veut dire qu’il vous demande tout le temps de l’aider pour accomplir de simple tâches. A 99%, c’est une stratégie pour créer un sentiment d’obligation et de dépendance rendant la situation assez difficile pour leur partenaire de dire non. Et c’est pour vous faire sentir coupable en cas de refus de l’aide.
Enfin, pour vous protéger d’un partenaire égoïste. Il faut que vous sachiez ce dont vous avez besoin, voir les actes et le comportement de L’AUTRE au lieu d’accorder de l’importance à ses paroles flatteuses, protéger votre indépendance d’esprit en ayant vos propres hobbies et amis et surtout parler de votre relation avec quelqu’un de confiance pour avoir d’autres avis que le vôtre à ce sujet.
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