Nous cherchons tous le moyen de séduire L’AUTRE. Dans cet article, nous (vous chers lecteurs et moi) examinerons les signes non verbaux de l’attirance et de la séduction.
Tout d’abord, il est important de noter que le langage corporel n’est pas un vrai langage. La signification d’indices non verbaux spécifiques peut varier selon la situation, la culture ou les différences individuelles de style.
Cela dit, il existe au moins 50 comportements non verbaux qui peuvent être étiquetés comme des indices pour attirer les autres. Voici quelques-uns des plus courants.
1- Le langage corporel de la séduction chez les hommes
a- Posture ouverte et détendue.
Être détendu et ouvert (c’est-à-dire ne pas croiser les bras devant le corps) envoie un message de confiance en soi et une invitation. Une étude a révélé que les hommes ayant des positions ouvertes recevaient plus d’offres de femmes que d’hommes ayant des positions fermées.
b- Maximisation de l’espace.
Les recherches montrent que les hommes qui prennent plus de place avec leurs postures et leurs gestes sont perçus comme plus attirants. Il suggère la dominance et rend l’homme plus visible.
c- Comportement déclaratif et doux.
Les hommes qui semblent en contrôle avec des signes minimes d’anxiété sont excitants. Les mouvements, les gestes et les changements de posture doivent se dérouler en douceur, presque comme si l’homme se déplaçait sous l’eau.
d- Ton de la voix.
Un ton bas et calme chez les hommes est très troublant.
2- Signes de flirt chez les femmes.
a- Ton de la voix.
En général, un ton plus aigu chez les femmes est charmant (pendant la parade nuptiale, les femelles peuvent avoir un ton de voix qui semble presque enfantin – ce qui peut déclencher un sentiment de protection chez les mâles). Des voix plus profondes, pour les hommes, indiquent plus de masculinité.
b- Positivisme.
Nos propres recherches sur le comportement non verbal “séducteur” suggèrent que les gens utilisent différents signaux non verbaux pour essayer d’attirer les autres, mais une chose en commun est que l’autre personne doit les percevoir comme des messages émotionnels “positifs/agréables”. Les hommes et les femmes qui échouent à séduire ont tendance à voir leurs messages émotionnels jugés comme “négatifs/désagréables”.
Tous ces comportements semblent avoir une racine biologique/évolutive liée à la parade nuptiale et à la reproduction. Le langage corporel des femmes semble plus souple, vulnérable et juvénile (signes liés à la fertilité), tandis que le langage corporel des hommes a tendance à montrer des signes de domination, de force et de confiance (signes liés au pouvoir, à la possession de ressources et à la capacité de protéger).
Cela dit, chacun peut opter aux signaux de langage corporel qui sont reliés en général à son éducation, niveau social et caractère qui en réalité sont les vrais gestionnaires de nos vies et comportements émotionnels.
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